He doesn't have a problem with drugs
He just doesn't get them
He's fine that his mates have tattoos
But he thinks they'll regret them
He likes going to pubs
But he hates when the music's too loud
He tends not to go to rock concerts
Cos he can't stand the crowd
But all he's ever wanted to be
Is a rock star on Rage or MTV
But he knows that it's not fucking likely
He's just turned thirty
He knows that he will always be
A rock 'n' roll nerd
He'll keep writing songs the world will never hear
And though they won't be heard
He'll just keep writing
Oh yeah
But you see the problem is
He always dreamt of being a star
But he learned piano instead of guitar
Which in the nineties didn't get you very far
So while all the other kids were learning Stairway
He was the piano to their forte
But he was convinced one day
He'd rock their fucking asses
Be an icon for the disenfranchised masses
And grow his hair long
And rebel against the state
But just for now that'd have to wait
Cos he's running late for his morning classes
And he will always be
A rock 'n' roll nerd
He'll keep playing gigs that no one knows about
And though it sounds absurd
He'll just keep playing
Oh yeah
But you see the problem is
There's not much depth in what he's singing
He's a victim of his upper middle class upbringing
So he can't write about the hood
Or bling bling
