Bad Santa - Santa's Fatherly Advice (It)

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You probably shouldn't be digging in your ass.

- Santa... - Oh, jeez.

- Is that your underwear? - Part of it.

Where the hell's the rest of it?

No, actually, don't tell me. I don't want to know. What do you want?

I was thinking I wanted a purple stuffed elephant, not pink.

But now I changed my mind.

- Yeah, what? - Now I don't want an elephant at all.

I want a gorilla named Davey

for beating up the skateboard kids who pull on my underwear.

And he could take his orders from the talking walnut,

so it wouldn't be my bad thing.

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