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I love it when my wife sends me
to the — grocery gore!
Ew, tampons?
Wash your car, mister?
We're raising money for Monster
High's fearleading team.
Oh, it'd be a bloody shame
if us ghouls couldn't raise enough money!
Without us, how will the Mansters
ever win another casketball game?
What...the [bleep]
are you doing?!
We're having a car wash.
I mean the puns!
I'm the Crypt Keeper!
Slays on words
are my thing!
I've never even
heard of you! Blah!
Yeah, if you don't want us to
wash that filthy piece of shit,
just get out of our slay.
You're so punny!
I just made
that [bleep] pun!
What the [bleep]
What the [bleep]
Hello, boys and ghouls.
What the [bleep]
Welcome to Monster High,
stranger.
I'm headless Headmistress
Bloodgood.
Well, Principal Goodhead,
I'm the Crypt Keeper,
and I'm here to shut
this shit show down!
What ever
do you mean?
The puns, man!
You're stealing my whole life!
Come on! Fearleading squad,
casketball team?!
Oh, it sounds like you want
to speak to the hizzay,
our physical deaducation
teacher.
Oh, goddamn it!
He's an invisible man.
He's fright behind you,
as a matter of fact.
Listen, knob job, either back off my schtick
or you can kiss this bulimic
emo gangbang goodbye!
Trust me,
I'm a shell of a man
with nothing left to lose,
and --
And I'm talking to the air.
[Bleep] it!
Mr. Crypt Keeper, you stand accused
of committing 448 counts of first-degree murder.
What do you have to say
for yourself?
Well, first of all, I find
myself here in «Fright Court»
I told you before,
this is not "Night Court."
It's just a regular court.
Well, thanks for stepping
on the bit. Can I finish?
How can I be blamed
for murder
when the entire school
glamorized death?!
Monster High
was wholesome fun!
That vampire chick, Draculara,
her daddy's Dracula!
That guy's put more high-quality
gash in the ground than plate tectonics!
I don't completely understand
what you just said, but I am a vegan!
Okay, veganism was
a 20th-century invention.
Aren't you
1,600 years old?
What'd you snack on
for the first 15 centuries?
You got me.
Blood of the innocent.
Monster High was a monument
to murder!
All I did was carry it
to its logical conclusion!
Case dismissed!
That's it?!
I had a whole bit
about a hung jury!
Hey, where's everyone's go--
ah, shit.
yourself
years
without
wholesome
whole
veganism
vegan
trust
vampire
thing
words
shame
goodhead
degree
glamorized
ghouls
finish
ground
draculara
snack
dracula
listen
enough
grocery
death
crypt
another
fright
hizzay
completely
behind
sends
entire
carry
blamed
goodbye
accused
bloody
about
talking
bloodgood
committing
fearleading
deaducation
conclusion
tampons
chick
before
slays
centuries
either
counts
gangbang
dismissed
mister
century
filthy
welcome
first
court
murder
thanks
stand
invisible
headless
school
blood
casketball
piece
having
heard
color
hello
quality
invention
keeper
goddamn
physical
logical
mansters
tectonics
stepping
innocent
matter
doing
speak
money
shell
monster
monument
myself
understand
never
raise
night
headmistress
nothing
bulimic
plate
punny
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