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My life is 24/7 bad.
I mean, the only happiness I get is when I'm out with my son.
I've been to marriage counseling...
I've done things I never thought I would have to do.
I've lit candles, bought self-help books, lingerie.
- Did the candles help? - Hell, no.
All right. I don't love her the way she needs to be loved...
and I don't even see a future for us, but then I look at my little boy...
sitting at the table across from me, and I think I would suffer any torture
to be with him for all the minutes of his life.
You know, I don't want to miss out on one.
But then, there... there's no joy or laughter in my home.
And I don't want him growing up in that.
No laughter? That's terrible.
My parents have been together for 35 years...
and even when they had a bad fight they end up laughing like crazy.
I don't want to be one of those people getting divorced at 52...
falling down into tears, admitting that they never really loved their spouse
and they feel their life has been sucked up into a vacuum cleaner.
You know, I want a great life. I want her to have a great life...
she deserves that.
But we're just living in the pretense of a marriage, responsibility...
you know, all these, these ideas of how people are supposed to live.
But then I... I have these dreams...
What dreams?
I have these dreams, you know, that...
I'm standing on a platform...
and you keep going by on a train...
and you go by, and you go by, and you go by, you go by.
And I wake up with the fucking sweats.
And then I have this other dream...
where you're pregnant in bed beside me naked...
and I want so badly to touch you
but you tell me not to and then you look away.
I touch you anyway...
right on your ankle, and your skin is so soft that I wake up in sobs.
And my wife is sitting there looking at me,
and I feel like I'm a million miles from her.
And I know that there's something wrong...
that I can't keep living like this...
that there's gotta be something more to love than commitment.
But then I think that I might have given up...
on the whole idea of romantic love.
That I... I might have put it to bed that...
That day when you weren't there.
You know, I think I might have done...
years - lat
wrong - źle
would - by
whole - cały
where - gdzie
torture - torturować
together - razem
thought - myśl
think - myśleć
there - tam
table - stół
spouse - małżonka
something - coś
touch - dotknąć
sitting - posiedzenie
romantic - romantyczny
really - naprawdę
things - rzeczy
suffer - ponieść
people - ludzie
getting - coraz
sucked - zasysane
future - przyszłość
dream - śnić
books - książki
fucking - pierdolony
candles - świece
commitment - zaangażowanie
terrible - straszny
platform - platforma
divorced - rozwiedziony
deserves - zasługuje
falling - spadanie
sweats - poty
crazy - zwariowany
loved - kochał
beside - oprócz
tears - łzy
looking - patrząc
right - dobrze
minutes - minuty
anyway - tak czy inaczej
pretense - udawanie
badly - źle
supposed - domniemany
admitting - przyznaje się
counseling - doradztwo
naked - nagi
vacuum - odkurzać
ankle - kostka
across - przez
fight - walka
dreams - marzenia
little - mało
given - dany
marriage - małżeństwo
going - chodzenie
train - pociąg
these - te
gotta - musieć
cleaner - odkurzacz
other - inny
great - wspaniały
happiness - szczęście
might - moc
ideas - pomysły
needs - wymagania
laughing - śmiać się
responsibility - Odpowiedzialność
bought - kupiony
laughter - śmiech
those - te
their - ich
lingerie - bielizna damska
parents - rodzice
living - życie
standing - na stojąco
pregnant - w ciąży
miles - kilometry
growing - rozwój
million - milion
never - nigdy
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