Exercícios
Comedy
That's My Boy

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That's My Boy - Worst Dad Ever (Pt)

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Categoria: Comedy

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Indisponível Legendas incorretas Conteúdo ofensivo Outros

script de vídeo

palavras para memorizar

So let me get this straight.

You want me to go visit my "sick mom"

that I haven't talked to in years, in prison,

- the day before my wedding. - Correct.

Not happening, asshole.

What the fuck did I do to you to make you hate me so much?

I am fucking baffled.

Maybe you don't remember, but you were basically the worst parent ever.

Me? I did everything for you, buddy,

and I never gave you an ounce of shit about nothing.

You never gave me nothing.

I gave you a snake.

Yeah, and then it died after it ate all your Quaaludes.

That was the only time anybody's ever seen a king cobra laugh.

And I take pride in that, so fuck you.

Yeah, great. You know what?

I basically had to raise myself, Donny.

I never learned how to swim.

I don't even know how to ride a bike.

You know fucking humiliating that is?

What about Mr. Mitty? Remember him?

What? No. What's that?

Mr. Mitty. I used to put an oven mitt on my hand.

He would cheer you up all the time when you were sad.

"Don't be upset, young man."

"I'm your best friend."

"Even though I'm an oven mitt."

No, I don't remember that, okay?

You know what I do remember?

You making me drive you home from the beach 'cause you got too drunk.

It makes sense to me.

When somebody's hammered, they have another guy drive home.

I was eight!

Well, you looked fourteen 'cause you were such a huge fat fuck.

I'm sorry.

You are such an asshole.

Dude, you're a millionaire now, and you're marrying that hot chick.

I must have done a pretty decent job as a dad, don't you think?

Oh, yeah? You want to check in on your pretty decent job?

Oh, my God.

You're a junkie? Who's your supplier?

'Cause I'll smack that motherfucker around.

It's insulin, you dick.

I'm a diabetic 'cause you let me eat cake and lollipops for breakfast every day.

But that's what you fucking asked for.

You're supposed to say no.

You know, I weighed 400 pounds by the time I was twelve.

You know how hard it was to take that weight off?

All right, all right.

I didn't know what I was doing. I had no one helping me.

Grandpa was a psycho. You know that.

Han Solo, don't be like this. I'm a good person.

Okay, don't call me that, all right?

My name's Todd now.

Call yourself Han Solo. You're dressed like him.

Good one.

I'm just saying, buddy, give me a chance.

Do you have any Axe body spray?

No, Donny, I don't have any Axe body spray.

Because I'm not a fucking douche bag.

That's a douche bag thing?

When did that become a douche bag thing?

Todd, the guests are arriving. Let's go!

All right, can you lighten up a little bit? We got a party to attend.

Good person, how about you put on a tie, okay?

It's a cocktail party, not a Quiznos opening.

What? I haven't worn a tie since my mother's funeral when I was three.

I'm not gonna start that up again.

That's great. Put on a tie.

- No. - Put on a tie!

I'll never sell out.

I'll give you a hundred bucks.

Where's the tie?

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young - jovem

years - anos

worst - pior

weight - peso

weighed - pesado

wedding - casamento

visit - visita

upset - chateado

three - três

though - apesar

happening - acontecendo

chance - chance

guests - convidados

remember - lembrar

gonna - vai

sense - sentido

every - cada

because - porque

myself - eu mesmo

eight - oito

motherfucker - filho da puta

psycho - psicopata

raise - levantar

hammered - martelado

everything - tudo

talked - falou

beach - de praia

arriving - chegando

doing - fazendo

drive - dirigir

asshole - idiota

funeral - funeral

makes - faz com que

quiznos - Quiznos

dressed - vestido

cobra - cobra

great - ótimo

baffled - desconcertado

drunk - bêbado

around - por aí

learned - aprendido

about - sobre

lollipops - pirulitos

breakfast - café da manhã

never - nunca

again - novamente

basically - basicamente

decent - decente

another - outro

buddy - camarada

diabetic - diabético

supposed - suposto

bucks - dólares

correct - um lugar para outro

laugh - rir

straight - direto

after - depois de

fourteen - quatorze

asked - perguntei

chick - pintinho

before - antes

douche - douche

cocktail - coquetel

check - verifica

little - pequeno

marrying - se casando

helping - ajudando

would - seria

start - começar

snake - serpente

fucking - fodendo

humiliating - humilhante

millionaire - milionário

opening - abertura

hundred - cem

insulin - insulina

junkie - junkie

donny - duvido

pride - orgulho

lighten - aliviar

making - fazer

yourself - você mesmo

maybe - talvez

mitty - mitty

nothing - nada

grandpa - vovô

thing - coisa

ounce - onça

parent - pai

cheer - torcer

party - festa

person - pessoa

friend - amigos

become - tornar-se

pounds - libras

pretty - bonita

prison - prisão

twelve - doze

quaaludes - Quaaludes

right - certo

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