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Comedy
My Man Is a Loser

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My Man Is a Loser - The Fix (It)

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1Guarda il video Inizia l'esercizio

Categoria: Comedy

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parole da studiare

Guys, I heard all about what's going on.

We are gonna work this out.

You know, I, I've yet to meet anyone who ignores customers more than this one.

We are all on the same team here.

If you need me, I'll be three feet away.

- Thank you. - All right, give it to me.

- Give it to me. What have you got? - It's not good.

I don't feel good. My panic attacks are coming back.

I'm starting to taste metal, and I have a sebaceous cyst

growing in the back of my head.

And my wife is threatening to fuck every pool boy we ever hired.

Lianne is not going to fuck the pool boy.

Have you seen my guy? He basically said "Fuck shirts."

He is a good-looking, muscular guy.

He looks like one of those Telemundo soap stars.

I don't know why you hire guys like that.

I'm not saying that...

What are the top complaints from your wives?

Top five or top 10?

What does she not like? What does she say?

Like me. She doesn't like me.

She says I smell like mushrooms sometimes.

All right, guys, I know I fucked up, but I'm gonna make this right. Okay?

I got the fix. You listening?

- Yeah. - Here's what I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna take things I've learned in my single life

and help you apply them to your married life.

Yeah, but how long is something like this gonna take?

I don't know, a week?

No, no, Lianne's gonna be married to Jose Jr. by then.

She's gonna have a whole Mexican family with little kids wearing sombreros,

doing the cha-cha-cha, eating guacamole dip.

- Marty! - What?

How are you going to take what you learned in your single life

and have us apply it to our married life?

You have sex with beautiful strangers, and...

we make waffles at 7:00 a.m.

Because everything I say, everything I do when it comes to women

is about connection. You understand?

You, my boys, have lost your ability to connect with your wives.

You're right, you know, I can't even connect the cable!

I hate my life.

You won't hate yourself after I'm done with you

because I'm gonna bring back everything you lost.

- What, like my manhood? - No!

Like, like being spontaneous.

Remember how spontaneous you guys used to be?

You'd do special things for your wife,

you'd show up at her work, you'd give her little special calls,

- you'd leave little notes. - Shock and awe?

Shock and awe!

- Surprise them? - Exactly. Surprise them with something.

- Caress your woman, caress your woman! - Yeah.

What are you doing?

I'm practicing my caress. Don't be a baby about it.

Admire your wives. All right?

I don't mean just admire them with your eyes,

admire them with, with, with everything, with your energy,

your ability to listen to them.

You know how much a girl gets turned on if you're really listening to her?

You gotta be part of your wife's life, you know?

You gotta be there. You have to... You know, to put it very simply,

you have to just show up.

Show up? Show up where? Where we going, the Copacabana? Where are we going?

- Wherever she is. - No.

No, Lianne is like a cracked-out humming bird.

It's exhausting just thinking about this.

Remember how funny you used to be?

Like that. That sense of humor? Bring that into your relationship, man.

Women love a guy with a sense of humor.

Funny gets you laid.

Mostra altro

yourself - te stesso

women - donne

wives - mogli

whole - totale

wherever - dovunque

learned - imparato

ignores - ignora

complaints - denunce, contestazioni

humming - ronzio

everything - qualunque cosa

every - dejte pozor

coming - venuta

eating - mangiare

guacamole - guacamole

gonna - andando

going - andando

bring - portare

exactly - di preciso

sebaceous - sebaceo

calls - chiamate

lianne - lianne

leave - partire

spontaneous - spontaneo

listening - ascoltando

understand - capire

growing - in crescita

because - perché

wearing - indossare

anyone - chiunque

apply - applicare

single - singolo

those - quelli

three - tre

basically - fondamentalmente

attacks - attacchi

connection - connessione

little - piccolo

ability - capacità

really - veramente

married - sposato

admire - ammirare

stars - stelle

heard - sentito

panic - panico

after - dopo

funny - divertente

gotta - devo

humor - umorismo

listen - ascolta

exhausting - estenuante

cable - cavo

notes - gli appunti

about - di

energy - energia

metal - metallo

beautiful - bellissimo

marty - marty

cracked - screpolato

comes - viene

there - là

copacabana - copacabana

family - famiglia

connect - collegare

looking - analizzare, cercare, guardare

woman - donna

saying - detto

looks - sembra

manhood - virilità

hired - assunti

mushrooms - funghi

mexican - messicano

muscular - muscolare

things - cose

customers - clienti

practicing - praticante

sometimes - a volte

remember - ricorda

right - destra

caress - carezza

sense - senso

where - dove

shock - shock

simply - semplicemente

smell - odore

relationship - relazione

sombreros - סומבררוס

shirts - camicie

being - essere

something - qualcosa

starting - di partenza

fucked - scopata

special - speciale

strangers - gli stranieri

surprise - sorpresa

taste - gusto

telemundo - Telemundo

doing - fare

thank - ringraziare

thinking - pensiero

threatening - minaccioso

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